Stop the presses!
To all media, the royal postal services, tabloids and other publishing parties (and yes, the idea of a publishing party does sound quite dull).
The New Official Royal Photo of Her Majesty, Duchess Beatrix of Heckofalot, is officially released by The Palace and is available for distributed wide release:
Please update your next publications accordingly.
In the interest of beating the tabloids to the punch, as it were, here are the official and decidedly controversial outtakes from the photoshoot…
Here is a rather cheeky and flirty photo of me I am sure will be construed in an unfavorable light:
And here I am saying to the Butler “Snap the damn picture already would you?!!!”
I can assure you that no staff were harmed during this photshoot and rumors to the contrary will result in my taking it out on the staff.
